Love is Biased...

Love is in the air.. but apperntly it's makeing alot of people selfish. I agreed to help my mother send a card.. but in the end since i opened my big mouth... my mom siad okay.. thn u help me do one can ?? All excited, i set to work on selecting the picturs and how i want the card would look like.. so i surfed ard.. finally when i got most of the pictures.. i opened my photoshop... and thn i set to work... after a while.. my mom said.. "If a company hired you.. they'd give u the information abt what THEY wan to put up right ??" knowing that she was hinting that i was doing anything according to what she wanted... i said.. "nope.. they usually say wha tthey need as in information.. but when it oems to layout.. it's up to me..." which is utter bull thinking i could u know.. fool her out of it.. she said she wanted roses but my cousin has my type of taste when it comes to these things... so i knew very well what she'd like and it's definetly not roses. My mom started to compalin that i was takign up alot of time... and that i'll be at my computer the whole day... and accomplish nothing... in the end being fed up i said.. sigh thn do it yourself lah. She walked off saying i knew it.. i just knew this would happen.... .

Lately my mom had been very hurtful... little does she realise that i'm also human.. and we can come to a compromise if she's just alittle more patient. I hate beign liek this.. she's always siding my brother and i'm the evil one who out to do everything that is bad. if anything is wrong it's all because of me. If she falls sick.. it's my fault. If my cat dies.. it'll be my fault. And if my brother doesn not come home.. it's my fault... why cos i'm not nice to him.... what can i do?? why is everythign my fault.. i feel so useless and hopeless it's bad enough i feel that i have no future. that i won't be able to go far in life... she coems along and make living harder for me.

It is becoming so difficult to be strong and to pretend that i cna can take it when everyone leans on me for courage.. when they have problems I'm the only one who's willing to help even if it mean i could get into trouble.. when my mom is sick.. I amd the one who does most of the things.. but no one seems to help me along.. when i need help.. no one is there to be strong for me.. to help me stand when i can't.. doesnt anyone care ? Do people hate me that much ? What have i done to hurt them ? Why am i all alone........ .